


Thunderhorse

by BrutalWarElf



Category: Metalocalypse
Genre: Adventure, Centaur!Skwis, Centaurs, Fluff, Grooming, Hurt/Comfort, Interspecies Romance, Interspecies Sex, M/M, Magical Artifacts, Mythical Beings & Creatures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-23
Updated: 2014-07-10
Packaged: 2018-02-05 23:30:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1836145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrutalWarElf/pseuds/BrutalWarElf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Toki has always been a vivid dreamer, but the centaur he meets while fleeing through the forest expresses a similar wish to wake up from his personal nightmare. Together, they take on a quest to deliver a book of seidr magic in the hopes of breaking Skwisgaar's curse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For zsomeone, who made the excellent suggestion of a Centaur AU

The early-morning forest was filled with bird song and the sound of softly rustling leaves, but in the moment between sleeping and waking, Toki thought it was too quiet – something was lacking. Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes and looked around the clearing, his cloak slipping to his waist. He rolled his shoulders to try and get the kinks out of his muscles where his head had lain on his saddle.

Suddenly, he realised what sounds he was missing; the soft huffs of breath of his horse, and the tearing of grass as she grazed around him.

Perplexed, he stood up and strode into the thicket to see if she had wandered off. How far could she possibly have gone? He had hobbled her properly, had he not?

Panic rose in his chest as the implications of losing his horse dawned on him. Stepping through the underbrush, his eyes flickered between potential tracks and his surroundings until he found the rope he had used to hobble her, coiled and trampled into the earth by a pair of hooves.

He had to find her as quickly as possible, or the lead he had on his father would be lost. There was no doubt in Toki’s mind that his father could and would track him across country to drag him back to the “missionary” work they had been on. He also did not have to imagine what sort of punishment awaited him for running away. The cold shivers running down his spine were only partly due to the watery chill of morning dew seeping into his clothes.

The Swedish border must be close, though there was no telling in the vast forests, and crossing it would make very little difference regarding his father’s pursuit. His best bet was finding the closest road to blend his tracks with other travellers’, and obscure his trail. But even according to his vague knowledge of the lay of the land, the nearest road was still days away on horseback.

He could not stay in one place, horse or no horse, so he shouldered the heavy saddle and his bags and set off after his horse, deeper into the forest instead of in the direction he had been heading for. The slightly too small, sheepskin shoes he was wearing did not leave any tracks, but that advantage was negated by the fact that he still followed his horse’s hoof prints.

Close to midday, Toki praised his luck of looking for his horse straight away, even though he had forgone any sort of breakfast and was starving. He heard the stealthy gait of big cattle somewhere off to his right. Fishing an apple from his saddlebags, he softly called his horse’s name. His father thought he was an idiot for naming livestock, but he could hardly communicate with her if she had no name.

The gentle swish of a white tail among the shrubs promised an easy catch. She had a very easy temperament, and if he took care not to spook her, she would go for the treat. Lightly stepping after her, he called her name a little louder.

The horse turned around, and Toki’s eyes widened in shock and amazement.

It was not so much a horse as a human, or the strangest mix of both species he had ever seen.

Pinching himself hurt, but Toki had always been a vivid dreamer. Chances were he was not lost in the woods without his horse at all, but dreaming in his own bed, or an inn along the road. As dreams went, this one was taking an interesting turn.

He approached the creature with curiosity, noting that though its light coat colour was similar to his own shaggy mare, its long legs and deep chest were unlike any breed he had seen around these parts before. It would have been a gorgeous horse, perhaps a bit on the skinny side, if not for the slim human torso sprouting above its shoulders.

“What on earth…?” Toki murmured, raking his eyes over the pale expanse of skin and the long, pale hair falling in frizzy tangles and dreadlocks across his back and chest.

Proud, sky blue eyes regarded him from underneath a frown, and a hint of a smirk twitched his lips when the creature dropped his gaze to the apple Toki still held in his outstretched hand to lure what he thought was his mare.

“You gots anything more substantials to eat dan dat?” It asked.

“Eh,” Toki rifled through one of his bags without hesitation, “do you likes bread?”

“I does. You can keeps de apple, I ates enough plants ever since I gots stuck like dis.”

Unwrapping the cloth from around a chunk of bread, he offered the slightly stale loaf up.  

“Stucks?” He prompted.

“I don’ts wish to talk about it.”

Toki’s dream subjects were usually a bit chattier than this, but the mystery only stoked his fascination high.

“Guess I’ll keeps this, then.” He took a bite out of the bread.

The creature’s stomach rumbled pitifully, but his aloof expression did not change. He did not look like he was going to get over his pride any time soon, so Toki tore the bread in half and held it out for him. One of his hind legs seemed to be lame as he stumbled closer.

“Thanks you,” the creature mumbled when he took the bread, keeping his weight on his other three legs.

“What’s wrong with your leg?” Toki asked around a mouthful of tough bread.

“No ideas. I can’ts quite reach. It horts underneath de hoof.”

“I could takes a look.”

He was used to taking care of horses, after all.

“Porhaps.” The creature shrugged as if he could not care less.

They ate in silence, standing at a respectful distance of each other, doing their best not to meet the other’s curious glances. Toki shook out the cloth when all the bread was gone, and put it back in his bag.

“My name is Toki,” he offered as the creature followed him with his gaze, but he got no reply.

Running his hand along the creature’s coat in assurance as he made his way towards the lame leg made the skin twitch as if it tried to shake of a fly. Gawking, Toki realised that his withers must stand at over seventeen hands – he could barely see over his back.

“Dis is weirds,” the creature complained when Toki stroked down his hindquarters and his heavily feathered leg the way he alerted his horses to imminent hoof care.

“Foot,” Toki commanded, leaning into him to force him to place his weight on his other legs.

He pulled the heavy hoof up by a handful of the long hair falling over it.

“I’ms not a horse.” The creature bit out.

“For all you gots a human brain, you mights as well stop kicking out.” Toki kept a tight grip on his pastern while the powerful leg jerked in his grasp.

“Apolgesecs.” He said stiffly.

Steadying him, Toki tilted the hoof so he could inspect it. There was a sharp rock embedded in the soft sole, and he could not pry it out with his fingers.

“Don’t be scared. I’m takings this rock out, but it might hurt a little.” Pulling his hunting knife from the sheath at his belt, he wedged the tip underneath the stone and wiggled it out. “Better?”

The creature gingerly put his weight back on his foot.

“Ja, betters. ”

“Alright.” Toki said, the urgency of running from his dad still at the back of his mind. “I have to get back to finding my horse if I wants to outruns my pursuer.”

“A stockies palomino mare?”

“Yes, you saw her?”

 “Ja, she trotted past last nights a ways away. Who ams porsuing you? Whats did you does?”

“I don’t wish to talk about it.” Toki echoed, childishly sticking out his tongue.

“Huh.” The creature smirked. “Amen’ts you a little shits.”

“Screw you,” Toki said cheerfully, shouldering the saddle again. “This has been an awesome dreams, but I’m off to finds my horse.”

Setting out after the faint hoofmarks, Toki gave him a little wave. He had not gone fifty yards before the clip-clopping of heavy hooves caught up to him on the deer trail. His gait was as good as regular again.

“Sometimes I wish I coulds wake up from dis dreams, too. Bes a humans again.”

Toki nodded slowly as he walked. He could roll with whatever his overactive imagination served up.

“So what ams you, exactly?”

“A centaurs.”

“Is that Greek?”

“No, I’ms a Swede.”

“You have a name?” Toki wondered.

“I was called Skwisgaar, once.”

“Where are you goings, then, Skwisgaar?”

“Nowheres. Been goings nowhere fors a very long time now.”

They walked in silence for a while, since Toki respected Skwisgaar’s earlier wish not to talk about what had happened to him, but it was not long before the centaur began complaining again.

“You’s a very slow walkers, Toki.”

“Is why I normally rides. I don’t gots no four legs, but I still gots all this gear I can’t abandon. I’m doings my best.”

“Pffft. You best. I bet I coulds walk fasters even as a humans.”

“Good for you.”

“You amen’ts goings to catch up with you horse like dis.”

“Then gives to me a rides.” Toki gave him a grin.

“No, fucks you. I’ms not a horse.” Skwisgaar looked down at him imperiously.

“Shuts up, then.”

By the time the sun disappeared behind the trees, Toki’s too small shoes were killing him.

“I can’t takes another step.” He announced, veering off the trail in search of a good camping spot.

“Hej, what’s you doings?” The centaur said urgently as he sat down on a patch of soft moss. “Don’ts you smells de wolveses?! Dey coulds come to eats you at nights.”

“Not really, no, but I builds a fires to keep them away. Will be fines.”

“No, it won’ts. You gots any ideas whats a pack of wolveses can does?”

“If you’re too scared, go on. I’m seriously not walkings another miles today.”

“Come ons, Toki, you can does it.” Skwisgaar nudged him roughly with his front leg, swishing his tail anxiously. “Just takes off you shoes and walks on you feet.”

“Ja, I don’t know if you remembers what havings feet am like, but that hurts. I won’t be able to walk tomorrow.”

Subtly sniffing the air, the centaur paced the clearing. Toki ignored him and piled dry wood for a fire.

“Toki…” Skwisgaar warned. “They ams close.”

“Here, takes my knife if you feels better.” Toki tossed it across the clearing. “I’ll have this fire goings in a minute.”

“Forgets de fire, gets on my back.” Skwisgaar nervously danced on the spot next to him.

“You know you can just leaves, right? No need to stay with me if you don’ts agree with whats I decide.” Toki was in no hurry. He had killed a wolf before – they made excellent coats.

Bending through his front legs, Skwisgaar snatched up Toki’s saddlebags.

“Just does as I says!”

“Seriously?”

“Ja.” He snapped.

“S-seriously?” Toki set down the log in his hands.

Skwisgaar gave him a shove to startle him into motion, and Toki swung his leg up to clamber onto his broad back. Winding his arms around Skwisgaar’s waist for lack of mane or reins to hold on to, Toki giggled.

“You keeps saying you’re not a horse, but here you ams with a person on your back, about to run away from some wolves.”

“You’ll thank me when you nots dead by tomorrows.” Skwisgaar replied.

“Perhaps being killed by wolves will be quicker than being killed by my dad when he catches up to me.” Toki muttered darkly.

“Hangs on.”

Struggling upright, Skwisgaar trotted back towards the deer trail.

“Oi, dis ams unscomfortables.” He complained as Toki tightened his legs around him to keep from bouncing around too much.

“Tries walking or cantering, is easier for me to move with you without a saddle.”

Crashing through the brambles that snagged the feathering of his legs, Skwisgaar broke out into a restrained canter. Toki shifted to adjust to the different rhythm, but inadvertedly squeezed his legs tighter around his rump. Only his grip on Skwisgaar’s waist kept him from getting unseated by the violent bucking that resulted.

Throwing his hands up over his head, Skwisgaar leaned his upper body forward to throw his powerful hind legs up as he galloped.  

“Woah, takes it easy!” Toki shouted as he hung on for dear life.

“Aaah, I’ms sorries, I can’ts help it – dis ams really weirds!”

“Just stop! I’ll gets off your back!”

“No, I can controls it,” he panted.

Abdominal muscles tightened under his hands as Skwisgaar gave a last kick into the air.

“Maybe you don’ts need to run!” Toki raised his voice over the thundering hooves as they tore down the narrow trail. “I don’ts even see any wolves!”

As if rising to the challenge, a call-and-response of howls rose from the hills on either side of them.

“You gots to be kiddings me.” Skwisgaar bit out, picking up speed, his long hair whipping Toki’s face.

The howls chased them until complete darkness lay over the forest, but they eventually veered off in another direction.

“Looks like they gots something else to occupy them.” Toki remarked to convince Skwisgaar to slow down to a walk.

“Whats- ” he panted, “whats if dey gots – you horse?”

“Then I’ms screwed. Probably ams anyways, since we didn’ts exactly follow her trail while runnings away.”

Skwisgaar nodded gravely, too winded to say anything else. His coat was lathered across his chest and under Toki’s legs, and his flanks were heaving mightily with the prolonged exertion.

“That looks like a good campings spot,” Toki pointed, swiping pale strands out of his face. “even gots running waters nearby.”

“Huh, ja. I shores coulds use some waters.”

Kneeling at the edge of the stream, Skwisgaar did not even wait for Toki to dismount before trying to get as much water as possible to his face with cupped hands. It would have been more effective if he had just stuck his face in the stream. Sliding down from his back, Toki located the dented tin cup in his bag, filling it with water and handing it to Skwisgaar.  

His legs shook as he left Skwisgaar to wash the sweat off the human part of himself. There was plenty of firewood to be found among the pine trees, and the fallen needles made a relatively soft carpet to walk on with bare feet. Toki had taken off his pinching shoes and socks at his original campsite, forgetting to take them when Skwisgaar wanted to bolt. He would have to take care of his blisters when he got the fire going, and sleep with his feet near the fire to keep the warm at night.

His situation was looking a little bleak with no horse, no shoes and no idea where he was, but perhaps Skwisgaar could point him in the direction of civilization. Dream or not, this had to be going somewhere.

The crackling flames were only useful for light and warmth, since he did not have anything to cook, but he had some dried meat, which he washed down with the water when Skwisgaar returned with the brimming tin cup.

“Cans you eat this?” Toki offered him a strip of meat.

“No, not anymores.” Skwisgaar grimaced.

“I, eh… You want some oats?”

Skwisgaar looked a little flustered, but nodded without meeting his gaze. Handing over the burlap feed bag as if it was the most normal thing in the world, Toki sat down. Shovelling the oats into his mouth by the handfuls, Skwisgaar went through half the bag quickly before handing it back.

“Beats grazing…” he said with an embarrassed smile, scratching absently at the dried sweat that matted his coat.

“I bets it does.”

The sight of the currycomb made Skwisgaar frown.

“What’s you doesing with dat?”

“Shh, just common courtesy.”

“I’ms not a h-”

“Yes, you am. Partlies, at least. Stand still.”

Toki raised the brush to rub circles across his coat, dislodging sand, sweat and dirt while Skwisgaar fidgeted and sidestepped.

“Stand still or I’m tying you to a tree.” Toki smacked his hindquarters with the brush.

“Hej!”

“Oh sorries, that is sort of inappropriate… Kinds of makes you think about how horses perceive beings handled by humans.”

“Pffft.” Skwisgaar scoffed, but he stood still, hanging his head as he allowed himself to accept the grooming.

The circling motion felt soothing, rubbing the tired muscles of his shoulders and hindquarters, and though the way Toki softly brushed the loose filth off with his free hand made him feel strangely connected for the first time since being cursed, it was hard to forget he was basically just a horse being groomed.

The sounds Toki made when coaxing him into lifting up his feet one by one for inspection and picking made him want to kick something, but apart from tearing his right front leg from his grasp and scraping it across the forest floor once, he behaved. The action earned him an smack to the side of his torso, where Toki instinctively expected a muscular neck.

“Sorries again,” Toki said quickly, rubbing the red mark on his pale skin.

“You know it.” Skwisgaar said mildly.

It was awkward, interacting with a human again after so long, especially one that was so unassuming and hands on, but he found that he had missed the company. When he lay down near the warmth of the fire, Toki came to sit close to his folded front legs and offered him a bone comb. Getting rid of the matted tangles in his hair was going to be a pain, and he was too weary to even think about it.

“Can you does that for me, too?”

“Sures.”

Toki’s solid weight settled behind his withers again, and he carefully worked his way up from the ratty ends to the roots.

“Thank you for saving my life.” Toki said sincerely, even though he had seemed indifferent about how he would meet his end earlier.

“Don’ts thank me, I’ms just beings selfish. You’s de forst humans I encounters in a long times, and you seems so nice. Woulds be a shames to sees you goes downs dis way.”  

“You’s making me very curious.” Toki murmured, dragging his comb in stages through a particularly stubborn dreadlock at the back of the back of his neck.

“I mights as well tells you, though I’s not prouds…”

“Hm?”

“I rans into some goil troubles a couple… eh years back. Decades. Ten decades, to bes prescise.”

“You beens a centaurs for a hundred years?! Holy shits! What dids you do?”

“One of my lady friends toineds out to  bes a witch. Shoulds has takens her seriously when she tolds me to gets off my high horse.”

Toki failed to stifle an ugly snort.

“Sorries, but that was funny.” Toki giggled. “Whats a coincidence. My dad hunts witches. Burns them at the stake in the name of God. Mostly innocent womens though. I tries to help them escape where I can, but…”

Skwisgaar made a disgusted noise. He may have been a libertine, but in his opinion the rising religious misogyny of this age was more worrisome than any amount of loose morals.

“Ja, I hates it. I hates him. If I never sees him again I can dies happy.” Toki’s hands tightened in his hair. “But a hundred years… you saids you’re stuck like this?”

“Until I learns my lessons, whatevers dat may be. I never figures it out on my own, and most peoples either tries to kill me or catch me, so I gaves up.”

“Oh no.” Toki sounded sad, and one of his hands dropped to where skin fused into Skwisgaar’s short summer coat, petting like he would comfort an animal.

Finishing his detangling, Toki stretched and yawned. Sliding down onto the cold forest floor, where early autumn mist was seeping into the earth, he shivered.

“I miss my shoes.” He pouted.

“Can’ts help you dere.”

Wrapping his feet in his cloak, Toki curled up as close to the fire as possible. Skwisgaar made silent promise to keep it going through the night. He had not slept in a hundred years, so he might as well make himself useful. As Toki fell into a restless sleep, Skwisgaar edged closer to him to reach the pile of firewood near his head, careful not to jostle him with his massive hooves.

As the temperature dropped throughout the night Toki sought the warmth of the massive body behind him, shifting until he backed up against his rump, curling up between his four legs like a foal would. The contact started Skwisgaar from his deep reverie about what it meant to be human, and he twisted around to brush Toki’s smooth hair out of his face.

However strange it had been to carry Toki on his back like a common equine, having arms around him for the first time in a century had made him feel more human than he had for an equal amount of time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has gotten away from me terribly. For all that it was supposed to be gross creature fluff, it now boasts an ongoing myth arc. I also adjusted the rating for language, mostly.

When Toki opened his eyes, the steady pitter-patter of water and the wet grass underneath him indicated that the shower had been going on for a while now. He was not very wet considering the conditions; only the occasional gust of wind blew sprays of mist into his face.

Struggling upright in his tightly wrapped cloak, he noticed the four white legs that walled him in, the feathering become steadily muddier the closer it hung to the ground. Looking up, all he could see was the round underbelly that was apparently shielding him from the rain. He adjusted his cloak and crawled out from underneath, immediately wishing he hadn’t when the rain came pouring down on his head.

“God morgon,” the centaur said stoically as Toki drew himself up alongside him.

His white blonde hair was plastered to his face and chest, lanky and wet, and he kept his tail tightly tucked against his body, the ends swaying in the breeze.

“Hello,” Toki replied with a faint grin.

The fire had gone out in the downpour, but at least his cup had clean water in it, and he swirled it around before taking a long drink.

“Haves you eaten?”

“No, nots yet. What’s on offers?” Skwisgaar perked up.

“Lets me sees… I gots more oats, if you wants them, apples, eh…”

Skwisgaar leaned over to peer into Toki’s bag as he went through it, batting his hands away trying to grab at something.

“… carrots. But I sees you already noticed.” He finished as Skwisgaar bit one in half.

“Oh, this ams goods.” The centaur said around a mouthful of orange chunks.

Toki watched with amusement as Skwisgaar finished the carrot and sidled up to him for another one with an intent expression.

“You’s the cutest not-horse evers, I don’t think I wants my old one back.” He smiled, waving the second carrot about to see Skwisgaar’s eyes follow it. “I wonders if I can makes you do tricks for it.”

“Fucks you, Toki. Ams you goings to give it to me or nots?” Skwisgaar griped, his front legs rearing off the ground impatiently.

“Catch!”

Crunching punctuated the dripping of rain while Toki bit into an apple and Skwisgaar pensively chewed on his carrot.

“Speakings of not gettings you horse back… whats ams de plans?”

“I don’ts knows what to does, honestlies.” Toki felt a little lost. “This rain washes away all the tracks, we lefts my tack behind last night, I gots blisters all over and no shoes… Do you happen to know where we even ams?”

“Ja, I does.” Skwisgaar replied after swallowing thickly.

“And?”

“Oh, huh… a three day walks from de nearest village. My kinds of walks, nots yours. If you hads to walks, maybe five, six.”

“I betters try to make it there before my supplies run out. Whats way is it?” Toki slowly spun, completely disoriented by the lack of visible sun through the cloud cover.

“Why you wants to goes there?”

“I needs to regains my bearings, because I gots a jobs to does before winter comes. Ams dat village in Sweden or in Norways?”

“Swedens. What kinds of job?” Skwisgaar asked, curiously bending down to meet Toki’s eyes. 

“Just… a delivery.” He said evasively.

“And after?”

“I don’ts know, I just lefts my entire life behind. Stop askings these difficult questskins.”

“Fines. I asks you an easy ones. Ams dere any more carrots?”

Gingerly making his way through the mud and across the roots and rocks, Toki followed the hypnotising sway of Skwisgaar’s tail. His feet already hurt after a morning’s walk, and he fervently hoped that his open blisters would not get too infected. Rain weighed down his heavy wool cloak, and the rim of his hood hindered his vision with a constant stream of water dripping off it. Thankfully his leather bags were waxed; otherwise his precious cargo might contract water damage.

“You’s gettings slow again, Tokis.” The centaur remarked.

“Bites me.” Was all he had the energy for, plodding along at the same, slow pace.

“Come on, mister dooms and glooms, you was a lot more cheerfuls yesterday. Can’ts let de rains bother you dat much.”

“I gots to take a break soons. My feet am completely raw, and I’m cold and tireds.”

“You’ll never gets dere at dis rate. I suspecks you’s just wantings to pals around with me longer.” Skwisgaar twisted his torso around to grin back at him.

“The sooner I has a roof over my head, the betters, but I gots my limits.”

The centaur sighed loudly for his benefit before slowing down and kneeling. He extended an arm, and hoisted Toki onto his back. His wet coat immediately soaked the seat of his pants and tickled Toki’s bare feet, but taking the weight off them was a great relief.

“I likes dat you didn’ts assume I woulds gives you a rides.”

“Yet here you are.” Toki commented, arranging his wet cloak across Skwisgaar’s hindquarters.

“Huh, ja. I likes going fast better dan dis saunterings you does.”

“Yesterday was kinds of a wild ride, though.”

“You betters holds on, den, while I make up for you slowness dis mornings.”

“Uhm,” Toki began, but when the long strides of Skwisgaar’s trot unbalanced him, he threw his arms around his waist and held on tight.

Wind, rain and hair lashed Toki’s face as Skwisgaar picked up speed, moving from a canter to an all-out gallop for a stretch, but without his previous bucking or the urgency of wolves on their tail, he soon dropped back into a pretty comfortable canter. Toki sat back, keeping a perfunctory hold on his sides with his hands and his centre of gravity close to the centaur’s body.

“Hej, dat wasn’ts dere before,” Skwisgaar suddenly muttered, his shortening pace causing Toki to try and look around his back.

A fallen tree trunk blocked the trail a ways away, but Skwisgaar showed no sign of slowing or taking the long way round, thundering right ahead.  Toki belatedly tried to get better purchase when he felt him shorten his frame and collect his steps in order to jump.

“Nonononono!”

Skwisgaar laughed as they soared over the log, momentarily suspended, but however Toki clenched his legs, the jarring impact of the landing smacked him straight up against his back.

“Haha, watch out!” Skwisgaar crowed as Toki had the wind knocked from his lungs between his heavy pack and Skwisgaar’s back.

“Oi Herregud, you crushed my fuckings balls.” He gasped, slumping against Skwisgaar in pain.

Snorting with laughter, Skwisgaar ungracefully slowed down to a walk and stretched his back with a content sigh.

 “You’s a mean thing.” Toki groaned, head-butting him.

Patting Toki’s hands where they clasped each other around his waist, Skwisgaar grinned.

“Just don’ts bounce arounds so much next times, you wills be fine.”

“Next times?! Are you tryings to kill me?”

“No, I’s hasing too much fun.” An arm came up around him to awkwardly rub his back. “You alrights?”

“Gives to me a minutes.”

The rain slowly let up as they made their way up a gradual slope, but Skwisgaar’s heavy hooves in the puddles still splashed his belly, and by extent Toki’s feet, with mud occasionally.

“I think I gots one of your hairs stucks in my throat.” Toki announced to fresh laughter. “You needs to braids your hair.”

“Maybe laters…” Skwisgaar shook his head to get rid of some of the rain water.

The light hair was starting to frizz where it dried, and Toki idly ran a hand through it to speed up the process.

“So, whats am we deliverings? Whats you gots in de other bag?” An inquisitive hand snuck towards the strap to unhook it from Toki’s shoulders.

“Hei, that’s not really any of your business, ams it?”

“You can tells me, we’s friends, right?” Skwisgaar smiled back at him.

“Really?”

“Ja, I mean, you likes me, I can tolerates you…”  

“Maybe I shows you when the rain stays away.” Toki pried the strap from Skwisgaar’s fingers.

Watching the muscles of Skwisgaar’s lower back roll as he ambled along, Toki tucked his hands in his sleeves to stop from prodding at them, especially where they were covered in hair. It was strange to see how pale skin went over in an off-white coat; nothing like the coarse, curly hairs on a human body, but short and smooth, and kind of lovely in a way.

A ripping sound made Toki look up to see Skwisgaar yank rows of leaves from the supple branches that hung over the trail and stuff them in his mouth. Toki giggled, because for all his human conversation, that was such a singularly horse-like thing to do.

“Whats? Runnings make me hungry, and you nevers know when you goings to finds nice ones like dis again.”

“Sorries, I’m not sayings anything.” Toki smiled, patting the spot where his hip went over into fur covered shoulder.

Realising he was inappropriately touching him again, Toki drew his hand away with a mumbled apology. However, slender fingers clasped his wrist to put his hand back, demonstratively rubbing it up and down a little. Confusion roared like a bonfire in Toki’s chest when his hand skimmed bare skin and silky coat alike, but he did as he was asked. Skwisgaar slowly came to a halt to enjoy the petting.

It was strange to think that though petting animals all over was a common practice no one broke their head over, touching a human like this was inherently intimate. Had it been one or the other, Toki would have been able to place it into a category, but this was extremely dubious.

When Skwisgaar hung his head and let out a content sigh, Toki felt himself flush. He was unable to draw his hand away however, bringing it around to partially covered abs and scratching softly through the short hair. In a way it was like giving a cat a belly scratch, he reminded himself, but then a small voice in the back of his head reminded him that it was in equal measure like touching a lover. Not that he ever had.

Ignoring the nervous flutter in his stomach, he flattened his hand across the bare skin of Skwisgaar’s abdomen, and when only a soft hum followed, he touched his other hand to the back in front of him. A little more daring, his hands roved across muscle, soft skin and sleek coat alike until he could feel his heartbeat reverberate in all his extremities.

He was breathing hard when the rain began again, confusion and embarrassment running rampant, trying to squash the strange affection that suffused him. Skwisgaar covered his hands with his own, and brought them up to study them before he continued up the slope.

“You has nice hands, Toki.”

“Thanks,” He croaked.

“I’m ready to gets out of de rain, how abouts you? We could sees if dere’s some caves in dat rock face up dere.”   

There turned out to be a suitable crevice for them to shelter in for the remainder of the day. It was shallow but unoccupied, and a short search in the vicinity yielded enough firewood to last them until they got dry at least. Wrenching out his sodden cloak and tunic and propping them up on sticks around the fire he wasted no time in making, Toki settled down on the dusty rock floor. Rain clattered into the small cooking pot outside to provide them with water, and Toki smiled awkwardly as Skwisgaar lowered himself onto the floor next to him, twitching his tail out of the way of his hind legs.  

“So, we’s out of de rain…” Skwisgaar said expectantly.

“Yeah…?”

“Was you still goings to tells me about you delivery quest?”

“Oh! It’s just a book.”

He had not actually taken time to check it out since he ran with it three days ago.

“You gots to gives me more dan dat. You’s runnings away but also on an errands…?”

“There was a womens I couldn’t save from the pyre. She gives to me a book whats needs to go to her son after she die, so I tells her I woulds bring it. When my dads turned up the road back home for winter, I saw my chance and rans with the book.”

“So where does you needs to goes with it?”

“I’ms not sure… it sound kind of silly, but she saids the book woulds shows me the way. Maybe there’s a map, or something.”

“What’s you waitings for? Checks it out!” Curious, Skwisgaar dragged himself closer with his front legs.

The plain, leather-bound volume belied its mystical contents of runes and formulas that seemed to move from the corner of his eye. There wasn’t a map, or any sort of discernible instruction with it, so Toki was quick to stuff it back in his bag.

“How weirds woulds it sound if I saids I seens dis book before?” Skwisgaar asked.

“Kinds of, but not inconvenient.” Toki said pensively. “You remember where?”

“A hundred years am a long times to keep remembering details…”

The long years in the forest, where only the season changing marked the passing of time, were not exactly honing his mind.

“Lets me know when you think of somethings.”

“Huh, ja, I’ms thinkings.”

As Toki bent forward to place a new branch on the fire, Skwisgaar reached around him for his bag to study the book some more.

“Whats you thinks dis ams, Toki?”

“My best guess am something magic-related, since I gots it off a convicted witch. Of course those accusations is mostly false, but who else carries books like this?”

Leafing through the book, rune markings indeed confirmed that the book belonged to a völva, and was filled with knowledge of seidr.

“Hm… You think it says how to torn me back into a humans in here?” Skwisgaar asked wistfully.

Was a hundred years not punishment enough, especially since he had still not figured what exactly he had done to deserve it?

“If it does, I can’ts read how. You miss beings a humans that much?” Toki looked up at him with his inquisitive eyes. “I woulds say this is a pretty awesome form to has; immortals and powerfuls and fast.”

“It amen’ts so much de human bodies part that bother me, but de exile.”

Everything he loved about life had become inaccessible to him; music, the company of women... With everyone he had known long dead, it was going to be hard to pick up where he left off, but what else did he have to look forward to but an eternity of wandering the vast forests of Scandinavia?

“Wouldn’ts tryings to break the spell instead of learning your lesson be cheatings? Whats if you does that and it kills you or something?” Toki sounded concerned. “Because you time ams already up?”

“As I saids, a century ams a really long times when you ams alone.”   

“I’ms here now.” Toki said blithely.

“Dat’s adorables, Toki, but for how longs? Think about it, huh?”

“Well, I’ms not goings to help you kills yourself. Gives to me that book.”

“No.”

“Give it here.” Toki scrabbled up onto his knees to try and wrench the book from his grasp.

“You’ll nevers gets it if I don’ts want you to.” Skwisgaar smirked; getting up on his long legs was enough to effortlessly keep it from Toki’s reach.

“Ams that a challenge?” Toki narrowed his eyes.

“Only if you won’ts admit defeat.”

“Defeat ams not in my nature.” Toki grunted as he jumped at the book Skwisgaar held over his head.

“Compliance amen’ts in mine.” He laughed.

Grabbing him by his waist, Toki swung up one of his legs and tried to get onto his back to gain altitude, but sidestepping easily foiled his attempt. However, Toki had not been exaggerating when he said defeat was not in his nature; backing Skwisgaar up against the wall of the narrow crevice, he kept trying.

“Pffft, tomorrow I makes you walk further, looks at how much energy you gots left.” Skwisgaar wheezed as Toki managed to heave himself onto his back, painfully squeezing his waist.

Still holding the book over his head, he warned Toki when he felt him shift: “Don’ts even thinks about standings on my back, because I _wills_ buck you off.”

“Just gives me the freakings book, it ams mine!”

“No.”

Resorting to bargaining, Toki loosened his grip, lightly running a hand across his flank like he had earlier.

“Whats if I asks nicely?”

Skwisgaar shivered, not so much at the touch running up his side, but at the tone Toki adopted while the warm skin of his sculpted chest pressed up against his back. Craning his neck to look back at him, Skwisgaar subconsciously lowered his arm. That was a mistake. Cackling, Toki slid off his back with the book.

“Laughs all you wants, I don’ts sleeps.” Skwisgaar sauntered back to the fire, folding his legs and lying down.

“Alrights, alrights,” Toki said, “if you promise not to does anything stupids you can tells me what it says, ja? I don’ts read runes - just Latin.”

The book yielded very little in the way comprehensible information; the Old Norse was muddled, and Skwisgaar had no idea what he was looking for. On the other side of the fire, Toki made a disgusted noise when he felt his still-sodden tunic.

“Gots to go out for more firewoods or I freeze tonight. Sees you.”

Skwisgaar continued his perusal of the book until Toki returned, soaking wet with chattering teeth and an armful of logs. Putting the book away, he fished for carrots in Toki’s other bag while the fire increased in brightness and warmth with added fuel.

“Come sits here if you colds.”

Being outdoors the year round had made Skwisgaar virtually impervious to the relatively mild rain and chill.

Toki scrunched the water out of his hair and crouched down. Nudging one of his hooves out of the way, he sat down in the space between Skwisgaar’s front legs. Skwisgaar pulled the trembling kid back against him.

“Now that I sees how easily you gets hort and colds in comparison, maybe you ams right about dis beings a goods forms to have.”

“Is that a subtle way of tellings me you think I ams weak?” Toki tilted his head to glare up at him.

Water ran in thin rivulets across his bare chest and arms as he shivered, and Skwisgaar used his hands to wipe it off Toki’s skin to help him dry faster.

“It ams alright… you gots other strengths to make up for it.” He teased.

“Like whats?”

Pretending to think hard, he smirked.

“Can’ts really think of anything rights now. Groomings am de only thing whats come to mind.”

“Myself or you?”

“Probablies both. You dids mess up my coats today.”

“You coulds just ask…” Toki huffed. “Ams pride a thing whats gets in you way a lot?”

“No.” He blatantly lied as Toki got out his brushes, vaguely remembering almost starving because he refused to eat what he believed to be horse food the first year of his transformation.

Toki followed instructions badly as Skwisgaar ordered him around with the currycomb, focussing too much on the stretch of back where he had sat, but the soft bristle brush he used afterwards was very nice, especially paired with the casual petting he did with his other hand. Catching himself, Skwisgaar shook his head. The enjoyment he found in Toki’s touch was nothing short of humiliating from a human perspective, but he was quickly moving beyond the point of caring.

Toki did not seem to care if he displayed traits that were less than human, and though that was weird in its own way, being accepted for whatever he had become was a powerful feeling.    

Kneeling on his front legs brought his head to a height with Toki’s to allow him to braid his hair.

“You looks kind of adorables with your hair all fuzzy from the rain,” Toki said as he circled to face him and inspect his work. “Less intimidatings at this height, too.”

He reached out to tuck a flyaway behind Skwisgaar’s ear, and something passed between them like a lightning charge in the distance.

“It wills hurt no less when I kicks you ass like dis.” Skwisgaar said, swishing his tail nervously.

“Is that whats you wants to does?” Toki replied with a hint of a smile, his gaze slowly panning over Skwisgaar’s face.

Skwisgaar took a deep breath. This was rapidly spiralling beyond his control.

“Maybe nots right now.”

Toki took a step closer.

 

 

  

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to adjust the rating again, because this got a lot more violent than I meant it to. Oops?

Toki took a step closer.

“I’m so glad you wants to bes my friend,” He said, a big smile splitting his face.

Threading one arm underneath Skwisgaar’s and one over his shoulder, he enveloped him in a semblance of a hug.

“When dids I says dat?”

The centaur sounded reserved, but Toki felt his arms close around him regardless, and the incessant swishing of his tail took on a less agitated rhythm.

“I wouldn’ts know whats I would do if I hadn’t met you.” Toki sighed, resting his head on one of his shoulders.

“Ja, you woulds probablies be completely lost without me.”

Despite that fact that the centaur was built on a much larger scale than he was, it was hardly different from hugging a normal human when he knelt like this. Hardly being the key word, Toki discovered when he felt lips in the crook of his neck. Surprised at the sudden, intimate touch, he froze. Before he could finish the thought that he would have expected any kissing to start at his mouth, the gentle, rhythmic scrape of teeth across his skin threw him off.

It took him a moment to catch on, but he figured this was the equivalent of what his horses would sometimes do when out to pasture; mutually grooming each other to reaffirm friendship. Dropping one of his hands, he used his fingertips to scratch back. The hot breath ruffling the hair at the back of his neck made him laugh quietly.

Skwisgaar stilled, and realising what he was doing struggled upright with a shuttered expression.

“Hei, where ams you going?” Toki asked, craning his neck to meet his eyes.

“Like you didn’ts think dat was weird!?” Skwisgaar said defensively.

Shrugging, Toki wiped the horsehair off his hand from where he’d scratched his withers.

“First I thoughts you was kissings my neck, but no, I didn’ts mind. I gets it. It tickle a little, is all.”

“Hm.” Skwisgaar said pensively. “I was thinkings you was goings to does dat before you hugs me.”

“Does whats?”

“Kiss me.”

“Oh, rights. Whats a coinskidence. You think we should, then?” Toki laughed nervously.

“Why on earth woulds you kiss a centaur?” Skwisgaar raised a sceptical eyebrow at him.

“I don’ts know…”  

“You’s a strange boy, Toki.” Skwisgaar remarked, as if he’d heard Toki’s amended thought that he would because Skwisgaar was very attractive.

Toki shivered under his assessing gaze. Without the backing of experience, he found it hard to gauge what was going on. Were they just joking back and forth, or was this an invitation to try? Whichever it was, Toki could not exactly take the initiative with their height difference. Needing time to think, he busied himself with rearranging his still damp clothes so they would dry evenly.

Sitting down on the uneven rock, Toki shifted uncomfortably. Its thin layer of dust, pine needles and small pebbles did nothing to soften it, and sleeping on it was going to be hell. Passing the time until the fire had completely dried his clothes by eating some of the tough dried meat, Toki watched Skwisgaar zone out while he stood around. With his head hanging and one of his hind legs resting lightly on the rim of his hoof he looked ready for sleep, but his eyes never fell shut.

Toki tried to imagine how absolutely exhausting it must be to be unable to escape his fate for a moment, even in slumber. A hundred years was a long time, but spending all of it wide awake must be a living nightmare. Admiration filled him at the realisation how well Skwisgaar was keeping it together - even though his memory was clouded in places and the boundary between human- and horse behaviour sometimes slipped.

Lying down on his warm and dry cloak he tried to get some shut-eye, but he found himself staring at the firelight dancing on Skwisgaar’s white coat for much longer than he wanted. Uncomfortable foundation thwarting his sleep aside, Skwisgaar was a sight to behold, and not just because he was an unholy hybrid of human and equine.

Enough time passed for Skwisgaar to rouse from his state of trance, and he stiffly walked around the cave to stretch his legs before lying down heavily next to Toki. He rolled onto his side, so that his flanks as well as his torso rested on the ground, his front legs in the air.

“You ams rights, dis floor am very bads.” He commented, shifting to find a better position.

“Yeah, I’ms not tired enough to sleep on it just yet.”

Toki propped himself up on one arm to look at him, and was struck by the thought that it would be possible to kiss him now, if he wanted to. If he dared.

“Ugh, dis ams worthless.”  The centaur grumbled, sitting back up and brushing debris from his back.

So much for that window of opportunity.

“I’ms not grooming you again,” Toki yawned, but he did help pick some of the grit off his skin.

“Shores, Tokis. Just goes to sleep.”

Though the rain stayed away the next day, the third was only intermittently dry. Having walked all day after a gruelling night on the bare rock had left Toki incredibly tired. The subsequent night on soft grass had not fixed it, because the temperatures were dropping fast at night. The wet chill did nothing for his sore muscles, nor his accumulating tiredness.

With his clothes still clammy from the previous shower, Toki groaned as the steady drip on the leaves around them increased.

“Nots long now,” Skwisgaar said as they descended the foothills. “we coulds be there by nightsfall. Or we coulds make a runs for it and bes there sooner.”

“I don’ts gots no strength to runs. I’ms tired and hungries as hell.”

Depleted provisions meant he had no way to replenish his energy, either.

“You shoulds eats something - here.” Skwisgaar tried to hand him a supple branch with mostly green leaves on it. 

The centaur was annoyingly chipper today; having spent all night grazing the clearing until only the patch of grass Toki slept on remained, he was neither hungry nor tired.

“No thanks. I don’ts think I can gets that down.”

“Suits yourself,” Skwisgaar said, ripping the leaves off and discarding the twig.

Plodding on in the downpour, they were both miserably wet again in moments.

“Come on, Tokis. I brings you to de edge of de forest, and waits for you dere.”

He stopped next to a fallen tree.

“I don’ts want to keep usings you as a horse…” He protested. “Is weird to me.”

“I’ms not a horse, and besides, I’ms offering, so is hardly usings me, ja?”

Boosting himself on the slippery log, Toki clambered onto his back. Skwisgaar’s logic was sound, as far as his tired mind was concerned.

“Holds on tights, we’s taking de scenic routes.”

“I thoughts this was the scenic – Aaaah!”

Toki clung to his waist as Skwisgaar hopped over the fallen tree and began a steep descent through the sparse underbrush.

“Just moves with me when I jumps.”

“Yeah, if you warned me, thats would help.”

As the forest thinned and the ground levelled out, Skwisgaar slowed to a walk. Reaching back to lace his fingers through Toki’s he spoke up.

“How long ams you goings to be?”

Toki stared at the way raindrops seeped between their joined, wet hands, momentarily speechless.

“Eh… depends. If I can gets everything I needs today, just the one nights. Goings to catch up on some sleeps and gets washed if I cans.”

“Alrights,” Skwisgaar said, squeezing his hand and letting go. “Come finds me when you’s done.”

He knelt to lessen the drop as Toki slid off his back.

“You, eh, wants me to bring you back somethings? Aparts from carrots?” Toki asked, lingering.

“Carrots woulds be greats.”

If Toki had not been staring at his face so intently, he would have missed the barely-there smile.

“Sees you then.”

“Ja.”

 As villages went, this one was a decent size, Toki thought while wandering the farmer’s market. It took him a while to find a pair of boots he could afford and a change of clothes for the imminent winter weather, but his other supplies like food and materials to restock his tinderbox and make snares were easily acquired.

When he entered the small inn, shaking out his wet cloak and hair, a portly woman with an apron put him up in one of the rooms. Eating a hot meal by the fireplace went a long way towards getting him warm and dry again, but he found himself ill at ease. Eyes pricked in the back of his neck, but Toki could not locate the source among the other grubby and hooded occupants of the dim room.

After darning his socks and mending the knees of his pants by the light of a few candles and the small hearth in the bedroom upstairs, Toki noticed it had stopped raining, though the clouds were dark grey in the onset of twilight. He wondered if Skwisgaar would be able to find any food – the forest’s edge had looked pretty bare.

Deciding he could afford a little trip to the outskirts of town before he would crash he shouldered his bag.  The second bag with the seidr book disappeared underneath the mattress before he snuffed the candles, just to be safe. He did not want to carry it around, but leaving it for prying eyes was not a good idea.

By the time he reached the fenced pastures on the edge of the woods, it was fully dark. The wind chased tattered clouds across the moonlit sky, and Toki did not feel like blindly searching the dark forest at all. Wrapping his cloak tighter around himself, he climbed onto the fence and called Skwisgaar’s name.

After a while, his stealthy but unmistakably heavy gait announced his approach. A brief spell of moonlight illuminated pale skin and white coat among the trees, and Toki held his breath as he slowly broke away from the woods, surveying his surroundings.

“What’s goings on, Tokis?” He asked when he ambled up to the fence.

“I wondered if you was hungry. Thoughts I’d come see you before I went to sleep.”

“I’ms not hungries, but is very nice of you to think of me.”

“Oh, alrights. Eh,” Toki fumbled for words under his shadowed gaze. “I betters go, then.” He said, without moving from his perch.

Skwisgaar stepped closer with an amused expression. “Goods night, little Toki.”

“Yeah, you too…”

Rooted to the spot by Skwisgaar’s physical proximity, he was torn between running for the safety of his room and closing the last foot of space between them. When long fingers suddenly brushed his, he shut his eyes tightly and pressed his mouth onto the centaur’s full lips.

A low hum preceded strong arms hauling his body closer and lifting him off the fence. Crushed against Skwisgaar’s chest, Toki awkwardly wrapped his legs around his waist and opened his mouth under the insistent probing of a tongue.      

Before he even had time to properly get into it, the kiss was abruptly broken.

Skwisgaar tilted his head in the direction of the village.

“Ams you hearings dis, too?” He asked Toki urgently.

The wind carried the mesmerising, unearthly chant of a woman’s voice.

“I knows dat voice…” He whispered, more to himself than to the boy in his arms.

“I don’ts hear any- Holy shits, looks at dat!”

Toki’s hands turned his face in the right direction.  Colourful runes and whorls lit up the sky above the town centre.

“Oh no, I thinks someone founds the book.” Toki let out a panicky moan. “Shits!”

“You needs to gets it back. Let’s goes!”

If they lost the book, he could kiss his only chance at figuring out his curse goodbye. Hoisting Toki onto his back, he galloped in the direction of the voice, coming to a halt under a window at the back of an inn. “Ams this your room?”

“Yeah, I-”

“Keeps your knife readies. You’s goings to gets inside and gets dat damn books back whatevers it takes.”

“How-”

Rearing up, Skwisgaar hooked his fingers underneath the wooden shutters of the windows and ripped one open. Toki understood his intention, clamping his hunting knife between his teeth and holding his arms away from his body. Grabbing Toki by his waist, Skwisgaar lifted him up as far as he could, and Toki pulled himself through the open window. Helpless to do anything further, Skwisgaar paced the dirt street with his eyes trained on the flickering shadows within.

Stumbling into his wrecked room with its content strewn everywhere, Toki balanced his knife in his hand. In front of the smouldering hearth his father knelt, stoking up the fire so the flames would consume the book faster.

“I should have known it was you who was in league with all those witches who got away,” Aslaug growled quietly. “You devil-child.”

Ignoring his all too familiar name-calling, Toki dived for the cast iron tongs. He tried to wrestle them from his father’s grasp, but his old man was still stronger than him. His knife was knocked out of his hands as they fought, sailing halfway across the room. Out of time and options, Toki head-butted Aslaug in the face hard, seizing control of the struggle as his father fell back with a cry, clutching a bleeding nose.

Pulling the charred book from the fire he tossed it onto the floorboards, stamping out the flames that slowly licked at it. Opening it to assess the damage was a mistake. His mind processed the smell of burning flesh before the searing pain on his back, but as the agony washed over him with a slight delay, he let out an inhuman scream.

A frantic voice called his name, but he ignored it as he scrambled out of his father’s reach. The red hot poker in front of his face smoked with remnants of his tunic and skin where it had touched him, and Toki could barely think with the pain setting his back alight. When his hand closed around his knife it seemed like a lost cause, because what hope did he have to get close enough to use it?

Backing up against the wall, Toki felt for the window with the intention to jump out, but a heavy pounding on the door distracted his father for the split second he needed. Half-blinded by his watering eyes, he threw the knife with all the force he could muster.

It hit its mark.

“Open the door! What’s going on up here?” A deep man’s voice bellowed from the hallway.

“Toki! Toki, godsdamnit, answers me!” Skwisgaar shouted from outside.

Crawling on hands and knees, fighting the nausea and pain that threatened to overwhelm him, Toki shoved the book back in his bag and pushed it over the ledge of the windowsill.

The pounding on the door increased, along with threats to kick it down.

Haphazardly shoving whatever he could get his hands on in his bag, Toki cleared the room of his meagre belongings. When he had pushed the second bag outside in the hopes that Skwisgaar would pick them up, the grimmest task he had ever done awaited him. Being an unwilling accomplice to murder was very different from this harsh reality.

His father’s eyes followed him when Toki stood over his fallen form, the wicked blade of the hunting knife protruding from his throat, his mouth opening soundlessly. Toki knew removing the knife would make a mess, but he needed that blade.

“Goodbye, father. I hope God gives you what you deserve for your life’s work.” Toki echoed more or less what his father would utter to his victims before consigning them to the pyre. “An eternity in the pit.”  He spat for good measure.

Yanking out the knife, like every movement he made, caused his tears to spill over, but it was not out regret for the blood that seeped into the floorboards at his feet.

Outside the door, someone was taking a hammer to the hinges, adding to the urgency of Skwisgaar’s frantic calls for him.

The effort it took to heave his father’s body headfirst into the fireplace nearly caused Toki to pass out, but leaving the corpse unrecognisable was the only way to throw off future prosecution at this point. Gritting his teeth, he made himself climb onto the windowsill.

Skwisgaar stopped his helpless pacing underneath the window when Toki swung his legs outside. The sounds filtering out into the night had chilled him to the bone, and the silence since Toki’s blood-curdling scream had made him fear the worst.

Trotting up to the wall he reached up to help Toki down, but the stench of burned skin made him recoil in horror instinctively.

“Helps me,” Toki moaned.

“Let goes – I catch you.”

Forcing himself closer, he managed to slow Toki’s trajectory enough to make him land softly on his feet. To his dismay, the kid lost consciousness and collapsed soon as he withdrew his hands to pick up their gear. A terrible burn marred Toki’s upper back in a diagonal stripe as he crumpled facedown onto the ground ; it was impossible to distinguish between charred cloth and skin in the dark. Skwisgaar cursed softly. He should never have sent him after the book alone.

The smell of smoke and burning flesh became heavier on the air after a crash and horrified voices from inside the room, and Skwisgaar knew their escape was long overdue. Throwing the bags over his shoulders, he counter-intuitively sank down next to Toki and shook him until he responded.

“Gets on my back,” he whispered urgently. “I can’ts carries you in my arms without touchings dat burn.”

Helping Toki as best as he could, Skwisgaar fled to the forest as soon as he felt him slump against his back. He ran through the night, worry and guilt fuelling his pace whenever his speed decreased. Retracing their steps, he led Toki back into the foothills and partway up the mountain, until he reached the cave in the rock face around dawn.

There was much that needed to be done, but all of it started with clean water. After arranging Toki as comfortably as possible on his folded cloak, Skwisgaar upended his bags to find the small cooking pot. Silently thankful he still had opposable thumbs alongside hooves, he got a fire going. As the wood sputtered and smoked, he crouched down as low as he could to press his lips against Toki’s feverish temple.

“Hang in dere, little Toki.” He muttered. “I needs you to sorvive dis for me.”

Boiling strips of cloth over the fire to make clean bandages, Skwisgaar cut open the back of Toki’s tunic. He apologised every time Toki hissed in pain as he separated the burned cloth from his skin, trying to hold back his gag-reflex whenever damaged tissue came loose with the linen.   

“I’ms so sorries… Why didn’ts you just torn tail and runs?”

“You saids ‘whatevers it take’,” Toki said through gritted teeth. “I wasn’ts going to throws your only leads on becomings a humans away like that.”

“I never meants for you to get hort!” He protested. “But… I thanks you for makings such a sacrifice. I owes you.”

“At least I gots somethings out of it, too.”

“What’s dids you gets?” He asked quietly.

“Revenge.”

Toki flinched as Skwisgaar yanked the last piece of linen free.

“I woulds hears what happened, if you wants to tell.”

“It seems my dads guessed where I was headed and mades better time. It was him – we foughts over the book, and he gaves me this.”

“Fucks…” Skwisgaar exhaled. “But you saids you gots revenge?”

“Yes.”

When he did not volunteer anything else, Skwisgaar tried to keep him distracted from his injuries.

“Whats happen?”

“Maybe I tells you one day.”

When Skwisgaar covered his burn with the moist cloth Toki closed his eyes, and he was out like a light by the time it was done, passed out from pain or exhaustion, or both. He monitored Toki’s breathing and pulse for a while before deciding it was safe to step outside. Piling pine branches in the back of the cave he made them a big pallet to sleep on. They would be here for a while.

Standing around with nothing left to do for the moment, Skwisgaar bent down to retrieve the bag with the book. The heat from the burned tome had marked the sturdy leather with soot and charring, but surprisingly, the better part of it was still intact, protected by the thick cover.

Guilty though he felt for putting Toki through this on his behalf, he was thankful it had not been lost. After hearing the enchantments that had been burned out of the book on the wind last night, he remembered where he had seen this book before - and where they might find its owner.

As soon as Toki jolted awake with a strangled cry of pain, disoriented and frightened, Skwisgaar was at his side, leaning over to wordlessly nuzzle his face until his breathing levelled out. Only distantly aware that the less than human part of him was taking over again, he moved on to Toki’s neck, gently nibbling his skin.

“I woulds hug you, but movings my arms really hurts.” Toki mumbled as he rubbed his thumb across the knee of Skwisgaar’s front leg.   

“I mades a bed what ams nicer to sleeps on…” He said guiltily, nodding towards the pile of foliage.

“Goods, I feels like I coulds sleep for days.” Toki said, crawling over to it on his knees.

“You shoulds, if you cans.”

Skwisgaar laid down at the edge; the back of his torso on the branches next to Toki, his four legs curling against his rump.

“Don’ts you wants to bes on the move as quickly as possibles? Sees if we can gets you back on two legs?” Toki asked.

“I cares about you more, and I wants you to takes all de time you needs to heals. Even if dis wasn’ts all my fault, beings a humans can wait.”

The ache he felt inside his chest had the bitter aftertaste of a lesson learned.

“To be honest I’ms kind of curious whats you’s like as a humans - but I don’ts want to waits for that, if you don’ts minds.” Toki murmured, snuggling close, his lips inches from Skwisgaar’s.

“Ja, I believes we gots interrupted in somethings importants last nights...”   

With worry and deep affection tempering impatience and base desire, Skwisgaar relearned how to kiss from an inexperienced kid.

It was not the only first he experienced in a century of being cursed: afterwards, he slept.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you start reading, a little caution. Yes, I went there. I kept it tasteful, but you might want to skip to the rest of the plot development if a little creature smut isn't your thing ;)

The amount of kneeling he was doing these days wore the coat off his knees, leaving him with grey patches on his knobbly legs where they scraped against rough rock, but Skwisgaar was not complaining. Taking care of Toki’s burn was the least he could do. Even after a week, the sight of the undressed wound was sickening.

It was healing on the right side of Toki’s spine, skin already closing in places where the touch of the poker had presumably been less hot or less intense. On the left side, however, over his shoulder blade, it had even charred the bone. That tissue would not be so easily mended.

Apart from the set times when Toki insisted on stretching and moving his upper body against the pain to keep mobile, the boy did a lot of sleeping, but today he seemed to have other plans. He fiddled with the pine branches he was lying on while Skwisgaar changed his bandages.

“Coulds you help me puts on my shirt?” Toki asked when he sat upright, stretching his right arm to fish it off the floor.

“Why? We’s not goings anywhere until dat wound look better.”

“Nothing like that. I thoughts I’d set some snares, sees if I can catch some small game.”

“Even if I coulds eat meat, smellings you burn puts me off it forevers.” Skwisgaar chuckled, but stopped quickly when he realised that was a rather insensitive thing to say.

Thankfully Toki giggled. “I assures you, my cookings smell nothing like that.”

“If you wants I can catch somethings for you, Toki.”

“No, I feels good enough to does that myself. Don’ts baby me.” Toki protested.

“You needs help gettings dressed – you ams basically a babies.”

“You know whats I mean. I gots to starts doing things again.”

“Believes me when I say dat you still has a long ways to go.”

“What’s you going to do? Stops me? Helps me put on the damn shirt.” He demanded, holding it out with a shaking left arm.

“Stubborns.”

“It take one to knows one.” Toki quipped.

Leaning over to take the shirt from him, Skwisgaar carefully eased it over his head, pulling the ends of his shoulder-length hair from the collar and arranging the cloth over his bandaged back. Toki managed to stuff his right arm through the sleeve himself, but his left shoulder did not cooperate as well, so Skwisgaar reached inside the cuff to pull the arm through.

“Thanks,” Toki said cheerfully despite the fact that it must have hurt.

Walking out into the breezy but sunny autumn afternoon, Toki rolled his shoulders determinedly while he hunted for tracks. As he stepped lightly amidst the sparse underbrush, he made a delighted sound.

“These boots am so comfortable, you won’ts believe it.” He said, spinning around as if dancing.

“I takes your word for it.” Skwisgaar commented, looking pointedly at his hooves.

“We’ll have you back on your feet soon enough when you gets us where we needs to be.”

Toki followed a rabbit trail to a natural funnel of saplings and got out his twine. Standing back, unwilling to disturb the area with his hooves, Skwisgaar watched as Toki wound his snare around a tree and positioned it in the middle of the trail, blocking the way around it with little sticks he stuck into the ground.

Toki laughed at himself when he tried to swipe his mousy hair out of his face with his left arm but it wouldn’t lift far enough.

“I can’ts believe how optimistics you ams about dis.” Skwisgaar murmured.

“Well, as I sees it I’ms still alive and I will gets better; I’ms on an adventure with a magicals creature whats ams a real goods kisser…” He replied distractedly as he adjusted the loop so it hung a couple of inches off the trail. “Is the happiest I remember being in a long time.”

“Pffft. _You’s_ a fuckings magical creature.”

He had intended a scoff, but it came out altogether too fond. Toki’s shy smile told Skwisgaar he was not fooling anyone.

A few days later, Toki announced that he felt up to travel over a breakfast of rabbit stew. Sunlight crept into the cave, but the wet chill of dawn was still noticeable on the air with the fire burning low.

“Ams you shores? Whats if it rain? Or ams real colds? Dat wound amen’ts close. It coulds get nasties and infected.”

“We’s goings south anyways, the weather shouldn’ts be gettings that much worse right away.”

“I don’ts knows, Tokis…” He said hesitantly.

“Didn’ts I tell you to stop babyings me? Whats you want to does, stays here all autumns makings out until we gets snowed in?”

Skwisgaar shook his head, handing him the bag he reached for. Though the making out part was appealing, if they got snowed in Toki was as good as dead. Despite his barely functioning left arm, he made a brave attempt at folding his clothes to show he was serious, so Skwisgaar helped him stuff them in the bag.  

“Fines. On one conditions. You rides. And you tells me as soon as you’s tireds or unwells. Huh, two conditions.” He amended, banking the fire.

“I’ll walk whenever I feels like it, but I suppose you can carry my bags.” Toki grinned as he stood up.

“You little shits.” He huffed. “You gots everything? Let’s goes, then.”

With only the trajectory of the sun and his foggy memory as a guide, Skwisgaar hoped he would not lead them too far astray. Even going south, the landmarks were few and far between among the thousands of lakes and vast forests.  

“So, you know where we’s headed, then?” Toki asked, drawing little circles in his coat with his finger as they set out on their journey with no hurry.

“In de direction of Trollhättan, whats ams a town near de greats lakes. Once we gets there, we gots to finds de swamp wheres de witch used to live and see if her deskendant stayed in de same area or if he move away. Sound like a plan?”

“Sures, I trust you know whats you’s talkings about. You ever beens to Trollhättan before?”

“Huh, ja. I grew up near de Göta älv.” 

“Witches aside, am dere actually trolls in Trollhättan?”

“If dere are, I never seens one. Some boulders at de Göta älv banks am supposed to torn into trolls at night, but... Well, if centaurs exists, why nots, huh?” Skwisgaar humoured him.

“Can’ts help but wonder though – this witch I got the book from, was she actually the one who turn you?”

“If she was, she lives an awfuls long times.”

Toki hummed noncommittally.

“Don’ts you think it’s all a bit too coinskidental for you and me to meets while I gots this book in my bag? A books whats you knows? Whats if you ams bound to it, and that’s what she meant by it showings me the way? It drawings you in and bringings me where I gots to go?”

Skwisgaar pondered his words for a while.

“Ams a very goods theory, little Toki. Maybe she sets us up. Sents you to finally teach to me de lessons. Though I figures since I’s still not humans, is a little more complicated dan dat. But I can sleeps now, since I realised something after dat night in de village.”

“Is all real weird to thinks about it like that. I didn’ts really know that lady or anything, nor she me. How woulds she knows who to pick?” Toki asked critically. “But you was saying you learned something?”

“Ja.”

“Like whats?” Toki drew out the last syllable.

“Huh… Dat it’s ams wrong to use peoples, because it have consequences for dem.” He mumbled. “I, huh…  never really careds about dat before.”

“Wells, wells, wells…” Toki said gleefully. “Looks at me, obliteratings centuries of selfishness in one fell swoops.”

“Ja, goes aheads, pats youself on de backs. Nots obnoxious at all.”

The weeks of travel south to the great lake of Vänern took their toll on Toki; even riding, his healing process took so much out of him that some days wore him to the bone. On the other hand, the ever changing landscape was a nice distraction from the slowly diminishing pain. Holding his cloak shut against the stiff breeze, Toki watched a flock of water birds scurry among the thinning trees.  

“Hm,” Skwisgaar said suddenly as the sound of lapping waves grew stronger. “Porhaps I wents a little too far east.”

“Whats you mean, Skwis?”

“You ever seens de greats lake before, Tokis?” He twisted around to look back with an apologetic smirk.

“No! Can we goes to the shores?” Toki answered excitedly.

Even if it made their journey unnecessarily longer, that was a sight he wanted to see.

Low autumn sun reflecting off the calm waves lit up the surface as if it sparkled, and Toki could not help a wordless exclamation of wonder. It was beautiful and so incredibly vast – he had never seen a body of water like it.

The closer they came to the sandy shore, the more laboured Skwisgaar’s breathing got.

“Ams this heavy goings for you? Cause I could walks.”

“No, nots at all.” The centaur replied absent-mindedly.

As if to demonstrate, his brisk walk flowed into barely contained prancing as he stepped up on the sand, heading for the waterline.

“You alrights?” Toki ventured, sitting back as Skwisgaar danced nervously, his sharp intakes of breath audible above the gentle waves.

“I’ms just sos excited about dis… Looks at dat stretch of beach – whats a greats place to runs! Holds on, we goes real fasts.”

After weeks together, his livening inflection told Toki exactly when the horse part of him was taking over.

“No. Nonononono. Don’t even think about it.” Softly tugging the ends of his long hair, Toki tried to rein him in. “Skwisgaar, no!”

“Toki, yes! Sits tight!”

“I don’ts want to dieeeeeees!” Toki exclaimed as Skwisgaar took off, his heart pounding in his throat at the thrill of the prospect.

There was nothing he could do but pray he would not fall off as Skwisgaar tore across the beach like he’d lost his mind. Briny wind and blond mane alike lashed his face as long legs propelled them across the firm, wet sand, clumps of mud flying up from the force with which his hooves pounded the shoreline.

Skwisgaar’s full-out gallop was the most terrifying thing Toki had ever experienced; the combination of the incredible speed and his tireless excitement making him fear it would never stop. It did not take long for Toki to get a taste for it, however, and he allowed himself to relax and go with it, relishing in the sheer power of fourteen hundred pounds of muscle making them fly across the beach.

They were both laughing like children when Skwisgaar switched to a more civilised canter, eventually slowing down enough to fall into a walk. Leaning forward and wrapping his arms around his middle, Toki sighed loudly.

“Whew! That was amazing!”

“I bets I’ms de fastest horse in all of Scansinavia!” Skwisgaar panted.

“You’s not a horse.”

“You knows it. But you get whats I mean.”

“Yeah.” He laughed. “Don’ts ever does that again.”

“You loves it.”

“Maybes a little.”

Nightfall found them a little more inland, in an empty barn along the way to Trollhättan. Figuring they could risk tresspassing with the weather holding steady and the cattle out to pasture, they made their bed among the fragrant if prickly straw.

“This ams nice…” Toki murmured appreciatively, covering the straw with his cloak before sitting down.

“Shores is.” Skwisgaar replied as he folded his legs underneath his rump and rucked up Toki’s shirt. “You know what’s also nice? Dat you wounds am all de way closed. How it feels now?”

“Pretties sore and stiff, still, but yeah, is gettings better. Feelings a lot more like myself again.”

“Go lies down, I rubs you back.”

The combination of a long day’s travel and long fingers gently massaging the tender tissue around the healing burn had him drifting off before he could even think to kiss Skwisgaar good night. 

With the grey light before dawn shining through the cracks in the draughty walls of the barn, Toki awoke to the sound of heavy breathing and an irregular drip somewhere behind his head. Opening his eyes, he could vaguely distinguish the outline of Skwisgaar’s underbelly over him. Resisting the temptation to run a hand along the bent front legs on either side of his ribcage, he lay very still to assess the strange situation.

The proximity of Skwisgaar’s face to his crotch slowly made him aware of his morning wood - and turned it into tempered steel when he realised the centaur was breathing in his scent between excited huffs.

A hand grazing his stomach made him gasp, startled, and push himself up on his elbows. Somewhere behind him, Skwisgaar’s tail swished wildly.

“Skwis?” Toki asked uncertainly.

“Toki… you smells so good,” came the feverish reply that trailed off on a needy moan. “Can I…?”

Unsure what to expect, Toki nodded, unwittingly giving the centaur permission to push his nose into the folds of his pants and inhale deeply. When Toki froze, legs tensing up at the sudden touch, Skwisgaar drew away with a whispered apology. He moved to lie down next to Toki, bending at the waist to nuzzle his face while his tail beat an erratic rhythm against the straw.

The hot, heaving breaths on Toki’s cheek set his skin alight with jittery anticipation. A hand snuck underneath his shirt as it had more often, but instead of roaming a familiar path across his chest, Skwisgaar tugged on the laces of his trousers. 

Nervously waiting to see what would happen, Toki’s breathing picked up enough speed to match Skwisgaar’s as knuckles brushed his erection. After dragging his pants halfway down his thighs, Skwisgaar rested his forehead against Toki’s, silently asking permission with small kisses to his face. Unable to give any words to this equivocal encounter, Toki sought his mouth to return the kisses.

Skwisgaar’s warm hand closing around his cock made him lie back down with a shuddering exhale, throwing an arm across his face to ineffectually hide both his face and his whimpers. Toki shifted closer to the huge body that curled around him protectively as he underwent the torrent of sensations and emotions that came with the intimate touch. Its soft and warm skin offered a measure of comfort by its sheer presence.

Reaching out with his other arm to stroke whatever skin he could, his sweaty palm wandered aimlessly across taut abdomen and silky coat alike. He subconsciously searched for a way to reciprocate, to not just be a passive and flustered recipient of this sort of attention.

“Toki, don’ts… You don’ts need to…” Skwisgaar trailed off, holding his breath as Toki ran his hand along his underbelly.

Not looking made it a little easier to accept where this was going when his fingertips encountered the rigid length that twitched under his touch. As he felt his way along the blunt, flared head, sticky with fluid, it was very quiet in the barn, both of them hardly daring to breathe. Spreading the copious precome that ran between his fingers around a bit, he gave an experimental stroke.

The centaur’s resultant soft cursing obliterated his doubt about how to proceed, leaving only curiosity and desire to please. Uncovering his face so he could watch his reactions, Toki tried to match the rhythm Skwisgaar set with his own hand even though he could not close his fist.  It seemed to be having effect regardless, if the way he bit his lip and threw back his head was any indication.

After a brief spell of ineffective bucking and a dirty, noisy groan and it was over.

They stared at each other in the dim light for a moment, shocked, twin blushes darkening their faces, until Skwisgaar’s hand picked up its rhythm and worked Toki over until he lay speechless and panting. Collapsing into the straw, Skwisgaar grabbed Toki’s sticky hand with his own and sought his gaze.

“Wells… thats wasn’t a complete disaster like it coulds has been.” He said dryly.

Toki laughed, snuggling up to his chest and tangling his socked feet with Skwisgaar’s front legs.

“I was goings to say we gots plenty of time to figures this out, but maybe we don’t haves to.” He said, kissing the skin that was easiest to reach. “You thinks we’ll reach Trollhättan today?”

“Is poskible, if you lets me run for a bit. Though rights now I coulds go fors another nap.”

“I bets you’re goings to miss that when you’s human again,” Toki said. “No more tearings across the beach or runnings through the forests – just two boring legs whats don’ts goes very fast. You beens a centaur much longer than a humans, right?”

“Pffft. Pretty shores I won’ts once I gets my lifes back. Dere wills be plenties to makes up for it.”

“What’s you goings to do when that happen?”

“That ams a goods question.” Skwisgaar said pensively, running his hand through Toki’s greasy hair. “I… haven’ts heard musics in a long whiles.”

“What, like in church?”

“No, little Toki. Like in taverns.” Skwisgaar kissed his forehead. “You’s such an innocent.”

“I begs to differ,” Toki retorted with a wicked grin.

They set out a little later in the morning than usual, but Skwisgaar’s tireless pace made good a lot of the delay. Once they skirting the north of Trollhättan on foot, he did not have to think twice about which direction to go, complaining he could smell the bog already. Toki shrugged at his grumbling, blissfully ignorant of subtle scents as they walked side by side.

“I don’ts smell anything except your sweat.” He smirked. “But leads the way.”

The cabin on the border of the forest and the fen did not look like anything magical, but at least it seemed to be inhabited. There were white linens drying in the breeze outside and the dull thud of an axe chopping wood could be heard on the other side of the cabin.

“Now whats?” Toki asked, turning around as Skwisgaar lingered among the trees.

“Coulds you go and sees? I gots no idea who it ams and de way I look…”

“Sure, gives to me the bag with the book. I’ll bes right back.”

Skwisgaar bent forward to give him a brief peck on the forehead along with the straps of the bag.

Circling around the age-darkened wooden walls of the cabin, Toki approached a tall man in a wheat blond ponytail from behind. A pile of meticulously stacked firewood nearly reached the eaves of the thatch roof next to his chopping block. Toki waited until the axe fell, splitting a round log in two, before speaking up.

“Hallos,” He greeted, watching the man straighten up. “I’ms looking for the owner of a book. Any chance I gots the right place?”

Spinning around with a guarded expression, the man nodded at him.

“I wills take dat off you hands.”

Toki dropped the charred book into the dry grass.

He knew that voice, that bold nose and that proud posture. The hair colour was a match down to the exact hue, and he did not have to touch those cheekbones to know how sharp they felt under his fingers. The only difference was from the waist down. He stood face to face with a human Skwisgaar.

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't read the epilogue. Seriously, it's garbage. You've been warned.

“I’ll gets it,” human Skwisgaar smiled, dropping to one knee to pick up the book. “Oi, dis one has seen betters days.” He said, looking up at Toki with a questioning look on his open face.

Toki watched him run his long, nimble fingers across the blackened cover and gulped, trying his hardest not to think about where he had felt their counterparts this morning.

“I… had to pulls it out of a fire at some point.” He fumbled with his words.

“Thanks you for your efforts on my behalf,” human Skwisgaar said, but the sarcasm Toki had come to expect remained absent.

Wondering if he imagined the warmer tint to his eyes to match his sincere tone, Toki blushed under the scrutiny of his steady gaze. Human legs or not, Toki still had to look up to meet his eyes.

“Huh… I didn’ts catch you names.”

“Is Toki.”

“Can I offers you something to eats or drinks? Maybe you can tells me how you gots dis.”

Remembering himself – and the centaur he left at the edge of the woods – Toki spoke up.

“This mights sound weirds, but woulds you come with me real quick? There ams something you shoulds see, I think. At the edge of the woods.”

“Of course. Leads de way.” Human Skwisgaar agreed, falling into step next to him.

“Toki – ams I saysing that right? – where dids you come from? De north? You gots a strange dialect.”

“Nots quite. Well recently, yes, but originally – hangs on.”

Scanning the trees, there was no centaur to be seen.

“Skwisgaar?” Toki tried in a small voice, unsure what to expect now that he was dealing with magic and human mirror images. “Ams you still here?”

He looked at human Skwisgaar with an apologetic shrug. Rustling foliage and a snapping twig eventually announced the centaur’s presence, but he froze with one foot in front of the others when he noticed Toki’s company.

As Skwisgaar made his way towards Toki’s voice, he noticed that he had not come alone. Assessing the man’s non-threatening body language, he decided to approach. The closer he got, the clearer it became that something strange was going on. Taking in Toki’s companion, who was holding the book, he felt drawn to him as if by spellwork, his skin prickling strangely as they made eye contact.

Looking down at the man before him there was a spark of recognition he could not quite lay his finger on, but Toki gawked between them, thunderstruck, as if it was very obvious to him. Skwisgaar looked harder, studying the way he dwarfed Toki with his height and his pale but regular features, but nothing sprung to mind. Remarkably, he did not seem terribly surprised that there was a centaur standing in front of him.

Before Skwisgaar could ask to be filled in on what he missed, the man quietly spoke. 

“Father… I’ve been waitings for you a very long times.”

Toki watched Skwisgaar’s face twist as if he heard distant thunder; if he had been any more like a horse, he would have been backing up with his ears in his neck.

“Ams you serious? Toki, ams he serious?” Skwisgaar’s voice took on a hysterical tone.

Neither of them replied.

“Cans you gives to me a moment?”

With all three of them stunned to a certain degree, Toki was the first to move, taking human Skwisgaar by the elbow and leading him back to the cabin. Looking back, he saw the centaur back up into the forest, his tail tucked close and his shoulders tense.

“He will comes around.” Toki murmured. “Wells… this certainly explain the resemblance. I thoughts my eyes was playing tricks for a moments.”

“Ams dat how I look?” Skwisgaar’s son wondered faintly as they crossed the fen.

“Downs to the last detail – from the waist up.”

Toki tried for a smile, and was not disappointed. His smile came easier than his father’s and held more emotion than Toki had seen from Skwisgaar so far.

“Who ams you, then?”

“Just a boy from Norway.” Toki shrugged. “I mets him three days after I gots the book. We… works together to gets it –”

“Waits, I’m comings with!”

Trotting through the high grass to catch up, Skwisgaar nervously flicked his tail as he approached his son.

“Huh… Whats ams you name?” Skwisgaar asked, cautiously leaning in to breathe in his scent.

“He does that a lot,” Toki said under his breath when widening eyes sought his. “I tends to just goes with it.”

“… Sigraif Thyrvisson.” His awkwardness had a less feral quality to it than his father’s, more curious and open. “Whats news of my mothers?”

When Skwisgaar remained awfully silent, Toki halted and caught Sigraif’s gaze.

“I’ms so sorry. She rans afoul of the church authorities in Norways, and my attempts to breaks her out of prison fails. She gots the pyre. I – ” He took a deep breath as Sigraif’s face fell. “I tooks revenge on the one responsibles, but… now I gots nothing more than that books, and the message she loves you.”

“Whats a strange days.” Sigraif said. “Gaineds a fathers and lost… lost my –” He pressed his knuckles against his mouth.

Toki sought Skwisgaar’s eyes, and the flash of apprehension he saw told him there was no comfort forthcoming from him. He reached out to squeeze the man’s shoulder.

“So sorries for your loss… Her last thoughts was of you,” he murmured, feeling like an intruder on his grief.

Sigraif dropped his head to Toki’s shoulder and wept.

“I tolds her not to go,” he moaned. “I _tolds_ her…”

Carefully bringing his arms around him, Toki could not help but be amazed by this human version of Skwisgaar in his arms, wondering if this was what it would feel like if they managed to break the curse. The physical similarities made it dangerous to become too familiar as he stroked Sigraif’s hair with practised ease despite never having met him before.

The stomping of a hoof drew Toki’s gaze to Skwisgaar, who fixed him with an unreadable look.

After a request for some time alone from Sigraif, Skwisgaar went back into the woods with Toki on his back, wandering aimlessly alongside a small brook.

“Wells, I wouldn’ts has seen that coming…” Toki began, but Skwisgaar hushed him with a sound of protest.

“Shuts up, Tokis.” He griped.

“Whats, we can’ts talk about de fact that you has a – ”

“I’s dumpings you in dis rivers if you keep talkings.”

“Oh, yeah let’s go swimmings! Lets me take off my clothes, first.”

Toki tugged Skwisgaar’s messy braid to make him stop walking, easily distracted by his excitement about the prospect.

“Dat’s more like it.” Skwisgaar murmured.

He needed some time to process meeting his previously unknown progeny without Toki running his mouth about every aspect of it, first.

Sliding off his back, Toki hung his bags on the branches of a tree and tugged off his boots. The purple scar on his back glistened in the dappled sunlight falling on his skin through the cover of the trees as he left his clothes in a pile on the sloping riverbank.

Despite the close quarters they had been sharing over the past month and Toki’s habit to take at least weekly baths, Skwisgaar realised he had never seen him fully naked. Staring unabashedly as the boy waded into the stream, he took in his well-proportioned, athletic posture. Toki shivered when water lapped at his lean thighs, goose bumps rising on his skin.

“Is colder than I imagined.” His teeth chattered.

“I was kinds of jokings about throwings you in… but I comes share in you misery, alrights?”

Skwisgaar’s legs were a little better isolated from the cold, but the waterlogged feathering made wading towards Toki heavy going.

“Then agains, if I throws you in you woulds be adjusted in no times.” He smirked as Toki hesitated to go deeper, picking him up by his narrow waist.

“Donts you dare!”

Toki flailed as he hit the water with a splash, and came up with his hair plastered to his face and a murderous look in his eyes.

“Oh, you’s goings down, you overgrowns pony!” He said, ineffectively trying to push him over from the side.

Laughing at his obviously useless attempt, Skwisgaar pushed him under water again for good measure, then waded over to the bank to get Toki’s brushes from his pack. Suddenly, Toki yanked back one of his front legs, and he knew he’d been had. He let out a surprised shout before his momentum landed him into the water, and when he broke the surface thrashing, Toki mimicked the dying horse noise he’d made until there were tears in his eyes from laughing.

“I desorved dat, I suppose,” Skwisgaar grinned, swiping the hair out of his eyes.

He cleaned the brush of horsehair downstream and helped Toki scrub the week old layer of dust and grime off his skin.

Returning the favour took Toki a lot longer, but Skwisgaar was content to merely stand in the middle of the stream and undergo the grooming. He hung his head in acceptance of the wait, ready to zone out, when he caught sight of his reflection in the rippling stream. While the image was not very clear, the face he saw there was one he had not looked at in a century – except today, when he had seen it on his son.

The thought triggered a long buried memory of a lonely woman in the woods, not the first nor the last in a string of lovers, telling him she was carrying his child. He had brushed it aside with those exact words – that she was not the first, nor the last to do so. It was a conceivable risk of taking him to bed. As it turned out, she _had_ been the last to carry a child of his. He had been half a horse ever since.

And now she was dead, leaving him without the hope of ever making amends. But his son was still here, either suspended in time by his mother’s spell or the longevity of witches, who knew? Perhaps he could begin to make amends with him for a century’s worth of abandonment.

Toki’s reflection joined his, and the boy grabbed his hand after a moment. Without his unsolicited opinions, his companionship was very welcome. They stood side by side for a moment, water rippling around them, until Toki shivered again. Pressing a kiss to the top of his head, Skwisgaar urged him towards the bank.

When he joined him in the sun, Skwisgaar could not suppress the impulse to violently shake out his coat, showering Toki with a fine spray of droplets. Toki smacked him on his hindquarters with an indignant yelp, and Skwisgaar’s laughter did nothing to make his apology sound sincere.

Bending forward, he grabbed Toki by his waist to hug him from behind. Not bothering to his double agenda, he let his hands familiarise him with every inch of wet skin on Toki’s upper body under the guise of helping him dry faster. The planes of his chest had become well-known territory, as had his bony back, and Skwisgaar moved on quickly to take advantage of his full nakedness, slipping a hand between their bodies and feeling out the shape of his ass. Like that morning, Toki’s scent subtly changed when Skwisgaar’s other hand stroked down his lower abdomen.

Under the clean scent of river water, the smell of Toki’s skin transformed; it became muskier and more powerful, even though it made him shy to be caught aroused in full visibility like this. With every breath Skwisgaar took of Toki’s heady scent his mind got foggier, boiling his thoughts down to only one thing.

“Hei! Hei, whats am you doing?” Toki exclaimed, bringing him back to himself.

He was bending Toki double, the skin of his neck between his teeth and one of his front legs slung over his back. Gently releasing his neck and pulling back his leg, he straightened Toki up.  

“Sorries.”

“I wouldn’ts mind if it weren’t for the fact that you weighs about ten times as much as me.” Toki blushed.

“Ja, we gots a bit of a size-difference problems.” He huffed, taking in the way the tip of Toki’s erection brushed his belly button as he self-consciously hunched in on himself a little. “I’ms surprised you don’ts seem to minds de other aspecks, honestlies.”

Toki buried his face against Skwisgaar’s sternum with an embarrassed noise.

“No, I thinks you’s very attractive regardless.” He mumbled.

After a kiss on his hair, Skwisgaar held him at an arm’s length.

“Why don’ts we go finds a good campings spot before we does anythings dumb?” He murmured.

Toki agreed with a wordless nod and fished his smallclothes from the pile.

“Let’s goes a bit back upstream, huh? Don’ts want to strays too far.”

“Ja, we gots some unfinished business with that book.” Toki agreed from inside his tunic with a muffled voice.

Skwisgaar let him pick their path, wandering away from the stream to where the trees were thicker. When Toki wanted to enter a clearing with thick grass and a patch of sunlight as his designated place to sleep, Skwisgaar did not follow, narrowing his eyes at the rings of agarics lining the edge.

“Come on, Tokis, we moves on. A witch was here.”

“I gots no beef with witches,” Toki said cheerfully.

He stepped into the ring and walked towards the sunlight. In the wake of his footsteps white, out of season flowers sprung up.

“Toki!” Skwisgaar hissed. “Gets out of dere.”

“Why?” Toki asked, spinning around. “Oh, dids I do that?”

“They springs up out of nowhere, dis amen’ts natural.” He swished his tail nervously.

Toki did not share his concern, dancing across the meadow to a melody only he could hear, light steps creating intricate patterns of flowers. Watching him dance with that rapt expression on his face, Skwisgaar was struck by the thought that despite his plain and unassuming appearance, the kid was painfully beautiful in a way that ached somewhere deep inside his chest.

Flopping down in the middle of the sunlight, Toki beckoned him.  

“Amen’ts no threat here… just flowers! Don’ts make me gets out de carrots.”

“We rans out a week ago,” Skwisgaar pointed out.

“Come on. Don’ts be silly.”

Hesitantly, he set one hoof inside the circle. Nothing happened, though a lingering presence made his skin prickle.

“I think she just liked to bes here.” Toki said, idly petting him as Skwisgaar lay down at his side.

He did not have to ask whom he was referring to.

Migrating to sit on Skwisgaar’s back, Toki undid his soggy braid and ran a comb through the waist-length locks. Perhaps he took a little longer than strictly necessary, but the centaur did not seem to mind; he was lost in thought. Sectioning the hair with his hands, Toki loosely braided it from the nape of his neck to the small of his back, then sat back to admire his handiwork. Briefly rubbing Skwisgaar’s arm gave no reaction, so Toki slid into the grass to pick some flowers. If brooding was the way he dealt with this situation, Toki was not going to hinder him.

Instead, he stuck flowers in Skwisgaar’s hair while he wasn’t paying attention, making a crown around his head and adorning his braid, all the while stifling giggles. When he was done, he set about making a fire on a bare patch of earth, ringing it with stones to bank the flames. Every now and then he looked between Skwisgaar’s serious, pensive scowl and the white flowers in his pale hair, and smiled. He wanted to fix that image in his mind forever.

“Whats ams you smiling about, little Toki?” Skwisgaar asked absently.

“You gots somethings in you hair.”

Come morning Skwisgaar roused Toki from his sleep where he lay curled against the centaur’s warm body, shaking him gently awake and kissing his cheekbone. Toki followed as he led the way to the cabin at the edge of the woods again, slinging his bags over his shoulder and matching his brisk pace.

Skwisgaar surprised Toki by showing genuine concern for Sigraif, who looked haggard when he met them outside. Making himself scarce as their awkward but well-meant conversation took off, Toki went fishing in the stream. He had to catch worms and beetles on the spot as bait first, but eventually he released his hooked lines into the water.

He had not thought as far ahead as actually catching anything, so when he held his first slippery catch in his hands he was at a loss what to do with it. Killing it swiftly with his hunting knife, he laid it on the rocks next to him for later cleaning. Some time passed before he caught another one, and he briefly considered jacking off to the memory of the morning in the barn. As one of his fishing lines twitched, he discarded that notion on account of wanting to be useful.

Returning in the early afternoon with five small fish, he caught the other men right when their conversation got interesting. They seemed to be discussing Sigraif’s entanglement in the curse, and Toki listened in while he set about finding a way to salvage his catch.

“…gots suspicious when I didn’ts seem to age after reaching adulthood.”

“Dis in not Thyrvi’s doings, den?” Skwisgaar gestured at Sigraif’s ageless face.

“Nor is you extended lifespans.” Sigraif answered.

“Dat’s weird. If it amen’ts a witch thing, den what? Why’s we not long dead and buried? And why wasn’t you mother?”

“Channelings magic prolongs life, but I don’ts got a shreds of de Talent. Mother never expected you to wanders for so long. She guessed you woulds be retorning to us or dyings before long, but heres we am.” Sigraif mused. “Must be you side of de family whats it cames from.”

“My mothers was dead before you was conceived.” Skwisgaar objected.

“Whats about you fathers?”

“A wanderer, a fuckings ghost in de night.” Skwisgaar said with a hint of bitterness that did not escape Toki.

Suppressing a snort at the irony, he began cleaning his fish.   

“An old wanderer, or young?” Sigraif said pensively.

“Why you ask?”

“Óðinn or Heimdallr?”

“Sigraif, you can’ts seriously believe…” Skwisgaar trailed off. “I don’ts know.”

“Is irrelevant in de grand scheme of things, I suppose.” Sigraif shrugged. “But you gots a problem.”

Flicking his tail uneasily, Skwisgaar inclined his head.

“I was hoping to find someones to helps me with it. You saids you don’ts gots de magics?”

Sigraif grimaced apologetically.

“My mother was lookings for you, you know? When she…” He swallowed. “When a hundred years passed, she wanteds to goes lift de curse, seeings as you didn’ts get de point anyways... Well.”

Running his hand over the cover of the book, he fell silent.

“You could tries de North…” Sigraif spoke up after a moment of thought. “I heard dere’s witches up in Lapland.”

Skwisgaar took a deep breath.

“One day, porhaps. Woulds you mind if I stucks around for a whiles? I woulds… like to gets to know you, especiallies if we goings to face de ages together.”

“I’ms a very private porson,” Sigraif began.

“Not like dat. Just… arounds.” Skwisgaar gestured in the general direction of Trollhättan.

“Yes. Please.”

Toki thought that the mixture of relief and joy on Sigraif’s face looked particularly endearing.

Clearly overwhelmed, Skwisgaar took him back on the road to Trollhättan after taking their leave of his son. Toki reached out to rub his side, and Skwisgaar covered his hand with his own.

“Where you goings to goes now, Tokis?” He asked quietly.

“Whats you mean?”

“Now you completes you quest. Back to Norways?”

“Why would I wants to goes there if you’s going to be here?”

“Tokis, I’ms not goings to torn into a humans any times soon…”

“Yeah, sorries to hear that. It don’ts change anything, though.”

“You can says dat again.” The resignation was evident in his voice.

“No, I means about wantings to bes with you.”

“Why de fucks woulds you wants to bes with a fuckings grumpies horse? You gots a whole life aheads.”

“Maybe I gots a thing for grumpies horses.” Toki said simply.

 

**Epilogue**

 

The overcast sky kept a lot of the unseasonable warmth, making it stuffy and hot inside while they worked on isolating the walls of their winter hideout. Creating an inner wall from scratch to counteract the gaps in the rotted wooden planks that formed the outer walls of the abandoned cottage was a lot of work. Fortunately, the structure was still sound and would withstand the heavy snowfall that was to come.

Used to living outdoors for the better part of autumn they had let it slide for too long while Toki built furniture like their big pallet, now piled with furs, and a table with a bench on only one side. The table currently doubled as workbench where Toki sawed planks the right size for Skwisgaar to nail them to the inside of the framework.

The sound of hooves on the dirt floor over the sound of the saw announced Skwisgaar’s return for a new plank, but Toki was still busy. A nose at the nape of his neck made his movement falter. Skwisgaar inhaled his scent as if he wasn’t covered in sweat and sawdust.

“Cans you stop smellings like dis, Toki? Is very distractings.” Skwisgaar murmured against his skin.

“Yeah, well, some peoples are workings.” He replied, putting down his tools and bringing his hand up to stroke Skwisgaar’s hair regardless.

Blunt teeth biting the back of his neck caused an immediate reaction because he knew what was coming next. A hot flush spread throughout his body like wildfire when he leaned into Skwisgaar’s touch. Cupping his hardening cock with one hand, Skwisgaar rubbed its outline through his trousers. Assured of Toki’s compliance, he released his neck and bent him over the table.

“Drop you pants,” he murmured in Toki’s ear.

Yanking at the cords with unsteady hands, Toki pushed them down around his thighs. Already breathing hard under the hand on his back pressing him to the wooden surface, he gasped as Skwisgaar reared up and folded his front legs on either side of him on the table, walling him in. Sticky fluid coated the back of his thighs as the centaur nudged them apart enough to slide his cock between them.

“Oh god,” Toki moaned, praying that Skwisgaar wouldn’t crush him in his enthusiasm.

“You’s alright,” Skwisgaar whispered, pulling back slowly, but slamming into him with a less than coordinated movement.

The blood pounded in Toki’s ears as he gasped for breath, more from the thrill than from discomfort, his painfully hard erection twitching with the need to be touched. Feeling the length of Skwisgaar’s cock slide between his thighs with rough, uncontrolled thrusts made his head spin with arousal.

“Oh, fucks,” Skwisgaar hissed as he pulled back too far and trapped his cock between his belly and Toki’s backside.

A few convulsive movements later he covered Toki’s back in thick ropes of come, biting out a low groan.

As the centaur backed off, Toki’s trembling legs refusing to support him, so he remained on the table, boneless and impossibly aroused.

“One days,” Skwisgaar panted, kneading Toki’s ass and laying down behind him, “I’ms going to fuck you properly.”

“You couldn’ts if you tried for a hundred years,”

“Nots if you didn’ts want it. But you’s going to.” He smirked, his hot breath against Toki’s backside.

“Sounds like an awful ways to die-iieee,” Toki yelped as he felt a tongue press into the cleft of his ass.

Skwisgaar hummed non-committally as he mouthed at his hole, plying his tongue to drive him out of his mind before making him come with a few teasing strokes of his hand.

After, he knelt and gathered Toki in his arms, swiping at the semen running down his back with a sound of mock-disgust.

“I’ms half worried you’s goings to be bored if I evers I torn back into a humans.” He huffed.

“Me too,” Toki laughed, “but we’ll make it work.”


End file.
